it's never over.

I'm just like...

Fuck.

Thanks Eli Roth, Audition was actually not that good.


I just want to go home, hang out with my brother, pet my cat, chill outside, go the apple orchard. There are no stars here, none. I don't understand how people can live here all the time. I don't need the city, I don't want the city. I want my town and my open space and stars and the earth. I want to be able to go the public/farmers/flea market on Saturday and have barbecues on Sunday. I want to walk through the field, lay in the driveway, scrap the walk, be away from people. My friends can only keep me occupied for so long throughout the day. I'm still adjusting. It's hard being being alone because all I do is think of what i'm missing at home, and it's hard to be with friends because it just makes me pine for the ones back home that much more. Instead of hearing sirens before I go to bed I want to hear frogs and crickets.

I don't want to miss fall.
I feel like I'm missing life.